10 Reasons Vladmir Putin Should Live with Me on Brokeback Mountain

Wikipedia tells us that Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin is a Russian politician who has been the President of Russia since May 7, 2012. But to me, he is so much more.  My affinity for “bad boys” runs deep. When I want bad, I go big. And no one is badder than President Putin. I believe that if we broke down some of his mental barriers, we could actually enjoy a sweet life together up there on Brokeback. Here are 10 reasons why:

1. His upper body strength will prove valuable in protecting me from animal attacks and keeping me warm during those cold Wyoming winter nights. 1

2. You know it could be like this. Just like this, always.


3. He can channel his rage for America into protecting our daughter on the 4th of July from classless hillbilly rednecks.


4. The man knows his way around a pole.


5. I like my knights without the shining armor, m’kaaay!


6. That watch better be waterproof. He knows we don’t have Express for Men up on this damn mountain.


7. He’s really into bears. They’re his Grindr Tribe. I can be a bear. Woof.


8. He bought these sunglasses at his first Market Days last year for $10 and he thinks they’re really cute bless his heart.


9. I don’t like guns. Like, I don’t think they should be legal or anything. But I mean come on. He’s basically Bruce Willis from Die Hard with a rosary, but actually gay. Drool!


10. I’ve got a thing for DL guys. Sue me. Oh Vladimir, I wish I knew how to quit you.



-Contributed by Ensemble Member Robin Trevinorobin

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